Today’s Reading:
Christian Marriage is a covenant between a man and woman, to be in a relationship and love each other till death part them. If you were wedded in a church, had a wedding blessing in a church or in a Registry in the presence of witnesses, and the ceremony was by the Christian faith, you are in a Christian Marriage. As such, you are expected to conduct yourselves according to the guidelines, tenets and teachings of Scripture, with fear and trembling before the Lord.
Song of Solomon 4:9-5:1 is a compilation of expressions of Solomon’s admiration of his bride’s beauty, thus referring to her as sister and bride. He describes her eyes as captivating and her necklace as a jewel. In 5:1 the term ‘my sister’ as is used in the ancient Near East, emphasises the endearment of a husband for his wife which indicates the closeness and permanence of their relationship as a sister never stops being a sister. It shows double honours bestowed on the bride. He loves her with the passion of a sister, and with the purity of a bride. The bridegroom wants the relationship to showcase the permanence of a blood relation. Again in 5:1, he declares that his marriage is complete and that his bride is more delightful than anything else. He compares possessing her to gathering myrrh, eating honey, or drinking wine and milk.
Solomon compares his wife to ‘a locked-up garden’ (v. 12) is praising her virginity. Many in today’s culture consider this old fashioned, but God has always had, keeping virginity for a good reason in his plan for the unmarried. Sex outside marriage makes one look very cheap. It can never be compared with the joy of giving oneself completely to the husband that one married. Solomon’s bride was as refreshing to him as a fountain. You are reading this, could your spouse say the same about you? Sometimes the familiarity that comes with a relationship in marriage causes us to forget the overwhelming feelings of love and refreshment we shared at the beginning. Herein lies the benefit of marriage counselling before and continuous counselling sessions in marriage. Do you refresh your spouse, or you are a bundle of complaints, sorrow, and problems? Couples in marriage should continually make an effort to refresh each other by encouraging and appreciative words, unexpected gifts, a change of pace, a surprise call or note, or even withholding discussion of problems arising until the appropriate time. Jesus said in the world there would be tribulation, but we should be of good cheer because He has overcome the world. This is why marriage relationships should be a haven of sustenance. The couple should find solace in each other’s affection.
Christ and the Church
In the same vein, the relationship between Christ and the Church symbolises marriage with Christ as the bridegroom, and the Church as the bride. The Church here is made up of the assembly of all who believe and trust Him as their Lord and Saviour, and whom He has promised eternal life. As the bridegroom, Christ is the head of the church. He leads, directs, controls, guides and is committed to the covenant union with her that was sealed with His blood. He is faithful, loving, and protective. He is the Shepherd, the Saviour and the Redeemer, He works to perfect and purify the Church. In return, the Church is expected to be a blameless and spotless bride of the Lamb without sin that was slain. Solomon praises the beauty, humility, endearment, the honours bestowed on the Church. Songs of Solomon also provide insight into what the relationship between Christ and her Church should be. The church is to faithfully preserve herself until the rapture when she would be united to Christ for eternal life.
Christian Marriage
Christian marriage is supposed to be more than a sexual union, and more than a legal institution that binds the property accumulated by the couple to an equal right of ownership. Marriage is a promise of companionship and provision for the needs of a couple to the end. Sexual relationship in marriage, unless it is perverted outside marriage, is supposed to be holy, fun, and wholesome. It is a stress reliever that brings couples into a closeness that cannot be found in any other way except through a right relationship in a marriage union. Being single-hearted towards one’s spouse brings great fulfilment for both partners in the relationship. A married couple should be able to abandon themselves to their partner in a committed, intimate relationship, as in their relationship with God. True love is worth pursuing, and it should be expressed with passion. A couple going into a Christian marriage should:
Clear the issue of genotype, and blood group which could pose a challenge when it comes to childbearing.
Before deciding to get married, be convinced of the partner you want to marry and spend the rest of your lifetime with. Remember that God is going to judge your actions whether positive or negative, good or bad.
Be determined that as long as no hostility could lead to death, whatever happens, you will stay in the relationship to love, support, to uplift each other and will be committed to each other. Remember two people from different backgrounds, orientations, and cultures are coming into a relationship.
Prayerfully drop friends that will lead you astray, or will not add value to your marriage.
In the family, all hands must be on deck. The wife is a helpmate to the husband. There should be mutual respect and appreciation. One should not seek to pull the other down out of jealousy. There should be positive support towards any project the other embarks upon, with the knowledge that the result will be beneficial to the family.
Put into consideration the feelings of your spouse before you unilaterally make decisions that will later affect the whole family.
The love of one’s marriage partner should be well defined from that of each other’s extended family and should be well placed.
There should be godly transparency in a marriage relationship. Deceit, lies and harbouring of secrets are the beginning of problems that can ruin the marriage.
When in a marriage, there should be a limit to the help that will be rendered, especially to the opposite sex. Because if care is not taken, it could lead to something else.
Couples should be all ears to each other’s grievances and be able to prayerfully resolve issues before they get out of hand.
Complete trust and forgiveness in a marriage should be taken very seriously.
Apart from each other’s altar, couples should raise an altar to God, and study the Bible together. Remember, families that pray together stay together.
As the head of the family, the man should always lead the family at the altar of prayer, unless otherwise agreed.
Marriage is a beautiful union if only we enter it together with God who instituted marriage.
OLUFUNMILAYO TITILOLA ADEKUSIBE
To surrender your life to Christ, say this prayer aloud. “Father, I acknowledge my sin against You. I repent and ask for forgiveness, in the name of Jesus. I surrender to the Lordship of Jesus. By the power of Your Holy Spirit, take control of my heart and lead me in Your path of righteousness. Thank you, Lord.”
If you said the prayer, Congratulations! Prayerfully look for a living church and meet the resident reverend, pastor or priest.
Prayer:
Father, give me the grace to live one day at a time and rejoice in every new day. Help me not to worry about tomorrow, instead to focus on You and your provision, in Jesus’ name.
Merciful God, as a result of the relationships, read in the Songs of Solomon, redefines a beautiful work in our lives and our marriages. Teach us what it entails to take time for our basic, high-priority commitments. Teach us to say No to insignificant things. Help and encourage us to turn off the television and computer, and turn away from involvement in any illicit activities that have a hold on us. Teach us to listen and be sensitive. Guide us in creative ways to express our feelings, and give us patience as we listen to each other’s feelings and plight, in Jesus’ name Amen.
Lord let power change hands at the gate of every department of my life, to the hands of the Holy Spirit, in Jesus’ name.
I daily put on the whole armour of God, and rely solely on God’s strength and power; Lord, encourage me, in Jesus’ name.
Lord, search me and see if there is any wickedness in me. Deliver me; let the blood of Jesus destroy and uproot every bitter root from my life, in Jesus’ name.
Lord, by the blood of Jesus, destroy and root out the roots of bitterness, anger, unforgiveness, covetousness, lust of the flesh, and wickedness from my life; thank you for producing good fruits in my life that I need in my marriage relationship
Lord, we hand over our little children, adolescents, young adults and grown adults into your fatherly care; redirect their steps when they stray, and teach them Your way of righteousness. Encourage them to say No to peer pressure, in Jesus’ name.
Lord, with your love and mercy, walk amid families going through hardship and challenges at this period. Bring deep, great and mighty deliverance and transformation in their lives, and help them to produce good fruits needed in their relationships, in Jesus’ name.
Thank You that Your Church is moving forward and higher, strengthen and encourage the Church leadership, and meet them at their point of need, in Jesus’ name.
Lord, look down on the plight of nations of the world and its people and shine your light on the darkness and chaotic areas, especially our nation, Nigeria, in Jesus’ name.
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